Across the Bar I Saw Your Face

I'm sitting here in a pile of things that I don't have the energy to pick up or move.  It's crazy how your heart can physically hurt.  It's definitely worse than any physical pain I've ever felt.  And people will tell you to smile.  You look so sad.  You are too ______ to be sad.  Maybe you just don't understand the reason.  Smiling usually comes with happiness, and it's not so natural all of the time for me.

I was there for a split second, happy in your company.  There was a glimpse of something that made sense.  And then it was stolen from me.  There's some reason why he's acting this way - surely.  Yep, there is a reason.  But not one that's pretty.  Or not one that will make sense - or make me look strong, or suave, or cool.

So now I'm sitting here, just waiting.  I know I'm over thinking   That's normal for me.  But I haven't been this stuck in a long time.  I was making progress.  I was moving forward.  And then you came along and derailed me again.  Again, it's crazy how you heart can physically hurt.  It's not just a phrase or some stupid song.  It's real and I'm feeling it now.

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